Shakedownsports.com

Yeah, that’s right. What makes you think you’re worthy of playing in an MLB spring training game? Why should you be able to play and not me? Who cares if you’re rich or famous. You can’t hit a baseball. That should be the prerequisite skill for hitting in a spring training game.

There are guys out there who work their asses off (with and without the assistance of steroids) just to get a single Spring training at bat. Even if they never get past Double A, the ones who make it to spring training know that on some level they’ve arrived; nobody gets to where they are unless they have what it takes.

Crystal’s appearance cheapens all that. One of the great things about professional sports is that you can’t buy your way into a game. At least I thought it was. I miss the good old days when celebrities weren’t allowed on the field unless it was to participate in some terrible all-star event.

I’m not scolding Crystal specifically. I shower insults on any celebrity who gets to take a couple swings so an MLB team can have some good publicity. That means you Garth Brooks. I don’t know how you managed to spend so much time with the Padres and have the only tip you picked up from Tony Gwynn be the fastest way to get from the Peoria Wendy’s to the Peoria Burger King.

One last thing. Why did Crystal have to play against the Pirates? It’s not enough that the Buccos are headed for their 37th straight losing season? The Yankees have to publicize the Pirates’ insignificance by choosing them as team against which they’ll bat a 60-year-old comedian in the leadoff spot. That’s just mean.

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